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Re: revelations and open eyes (no OtR)

Alright, alright, the story goes as follows, context and all.

      He and I were on the phone, and the conversation started out with us 
talking about having latent feelings for each other.  It was a pretty casual 
conversation, since the two of us are close friends and not much makes 
things weird.
      I brought up the fact that, as of late, I have been trying to make a 
list of standards by which to measure boys that I can stick to.  (This is 
the result of many a terrible relationship brought on by my lack of 
standards and/or inability to stick with the ones that I have had.)  As an 
example, I said that I only wanted to date boys who had chosen me uniquely 
and only from all the rest.  I then went on to say that I didn't see myself 
dating anyone in the near furture because my list was still incomplete.
      He then told me that, quite honestly, he was going to date someone 
when the opportunity arose because he just wanted to be dating someone, and 
it didn't have to be me.
      In reply, I made some refrence to him not measuring up to the one 
example of a standard that I had, and then things got rather awkward for a 
bit.  Not for long though, because then we talked of other things.
      In my mind there is the analogy of a lottery ticket.  I see his name 
emblazoned on silvery scratch off stuff, and as I scratch it off, there is 
nothing underneath.  I don't feel hurt by it, and am rather glad for his 
honesty.

liesel wrote:

darling, where is your stamina?  if you are
considering the monastery before you get out of
college there is no way your going to win the dating
game out of school.

     Oh dear.  I wonder if I should have ever written that in conjunction 
with the other.  I am not running out to sign up for the monastic draft.  
It's merely an idea that I think deserves as much consideration as any 
other.  I know that I COULD do it, but that doesn't mean I should.  In 
retrospect, I realize that those two ideas in the same email make me sound 
rather reactionary.

     I loved your wonderful poem, and I am happy that you shared it with me. 
  If nothing else, you and I can head up different branches of 
rent-a-husband.

off to buy my copy of the tribute CD,
Samantha


Oh the night came undone like a party dress
And fell at her feet in a beautiful mess
The smoke and the whiskey came home in her curls
And they crept through the dreams of the barroom girls
--Gillian Welch


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