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When Good Catholics Go Bad

Umm.  How bored am I?

A high school pal sent us this quiz:

http://www.beliefnet.com/story/76/story_7665_1.html

it essentially asks you a 20 questions re: your belief system and then 
recommends a religion for you to follow.  So we've been emailing back and 
forth on it for a day or so..  None of them are on this list, but Chris 
brought up "This is starting to sound like an Over the Rhine email list 
thread" which seemed pretty true, funny.

Our "humor" is all about goofy sarcasm, growing up Catholic, etc...  The 
humor is hidden somewhere below.  As with any good email chain, it starts 
from the bottom and goes up.

Happy New Year,
Bruce


From: "B., Christopher/DAY"
To: 'Kevin C.', Dean_M.
CC: b_lachey at hotmail_com
Subject: RE: Fun test....
Date: Thu, 3 Jan 2002 11:00:39 -0700
I read on encylopedia.com that the term Quakers was originally intended as 
an insult.  Don't ask me why.
This is starting to sound like an Over the Rhine email list thread.


From: Kevin C. [mailto:C.k]
You're right.  It actually became like this turf war over who could 'shake' 
more.  So, the one gang called themselves "Shakers."  This enraged the other 
group, as the best name had been taken.  Well, they sought revenge by 
adopting the name that implies the shaking of the earth itself.
And when they had a 'shake-off,'  whooo! watch out!


From: Dean_M.
Uh,  I think that was the "Shakers" not the Quakers.


From: Chris B.
If that's how they got thier names, then why aren't Roman Catholics called 
Snorers?


From: Kevin C.
Quakers get their title from their behavior during services.  Word has it 
that early in the Quaker faith, people would shake when they felt 'the
spirit' move them.  Their shaking was coined quaking, and thus they were 
called 'Quakers.'
Now it is clear why Dean's favorite word in the whole of the English 
language is 'palsied.'  A Quaker, such as he, looks palsied when they
shake.  I guess it's true, Dean - your true faith defines you.


From: "B., Christopher/DAY"
Well said, Brother Greaber.
(Aren't Quakers kind of like Amish is some ways?)


From: Dean_M. [mailto:Dean_M.]
Quakers Rule!


From: Bruce Lachey
Once I clear my engrams and get to the Operational Thetan level, I’m ready 
for pickup.


From "B., Christopher
Pagans.  I'm curious, when is your spaceship coming to pick you and Kevin up 
and bring you to God?
Your time to burn in the fires of Hell is coming soon.


From: Bruce Lachey [mailto:b_lachey at hotmail_com]
My results are below.  Kevin, I imagine we're in agreement 100% on these 
things, so I think we're exactly matched.
Secular Humanists RULE!!  (?!?)
I'm pissed that it didn't have a Duran-based religion or any questions 
regarding Simon.
I'm talking for free, I can't help myself,
Bruce

1.  Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2.  Liberal Quaker (93%)
3.  Theravada Buddhism (91%)
4.  Secular Humanism (89%)
5.  Liberal Protestant (87%)
6.  Neo-Paganism (76%)
7.  Mahayana Buddhism (69%)
8.  Baha'i (68%)
9.  New Age (66%)
10.  Taoism (62%)
11.  Jainism (62%)
12.  Orthodox Quaker (60%)
13.  Atheism and Agnosticism (58%)
14.  Reform Judaism (56%)
15.  Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (55%)
16.  Latter-day Saint (Mormon) (47%)
17.  Sikhism (46%)
18.  Scientology (45%)
19.  New Thought (44%)
20.  Conservative Protestant (41%)
21.  Hinduism (41%)
22.  Jehovah's Witness (38%)
23.  Orthodox Judaism (32%)
24.  Seventh Day Adventist (32%)
25.  Islam (30%)
26.  Eastern Orthodox (18%)
27.  Roman Catholic (18%)


From: Kevin C.
I was 100% Unitarian Universalist.  This seems to be the repository for 
nondescript beliefs.  Yeah, I was dead last for Roman Catholicism.
Neo-pagan was up on the list - excuse me while I go blood-let a goat.
Taoism ranks high for me also.
I think, if nothing else, this test demonstrates its own uselessness.  I 
mean, thank God someone put this test out there - I would have wondered
through life aimlessly unaware of my own beliefs!!
UNIVERSALISTS RULE!!!!


From: Dean_M.
Orthodox Quaker was the next one down the list for me. I wonder what the key 
difference was?  My mother would be mortified. I think Catholicism is more 
of a habit for me than a strong set of beliefs.  I believe in very few of 
its core beliefs.  Look out Hell here I come.
Thank got the Liberal Quaker heaven will take me in.


From "B., Christopher”
I was an Orthodox Quaker (100%) with Liberal Protestant (96%) as a close 
second.  I don't understand that since I don't buy into the whole
Genesis thing yet Orthodox Quakers do so I'm not sure how the percentages 
are figured.  Catholic was way down the list for me as well.
Liberal Quaker.  Heretics every one.  Come back to the one, true faith Dean 
as Othodox is the only form of Quakerism in the eyes of God.


From: Dean_M. [mailto:Dean_M.]
According to this thing I'm a Liberal Quaker,  Catholic was way down on the 
list.  Islam and Jewish were way above Catholic.


From: Kevin C.
This is a fun little test.
http://www.beliefnet.com/story/76/story_7665_1.html



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