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Re: Melanie's new sig
>From: Dan Temmesfeld <dtemm at yahoo_com>
>dude, it smells like onion to me...
>
wow, a thread named after lil' ol' me!
i love the onion. www.onion.com. and fwiw, here are some more of my
favorites:
Art Major To Stop Capitalizing Name
COLUMBUS, OH—Michael Wechsler, 19, an Ohio State University art
major, announced Monday that he is changing his name to "michael
wechsler." "Isn't that so much cooler?" Wechsler said to fellow art
major Ethan Reed. "The whole capital-letter thing has always
bothered me. It's just a stupid rule that everyone else seems to
think they have to follow." Wechsler is also considering changing
the spelling of his first name to "mychal."
Area Woman Not Yelling At You, She's Just Saying
JACKSONVILLE, FL—Area resident Roberta Pearle clarified Monday that,
while it may look like she is yelling at you, she is actually just
saying. "I'm not yelling at you," Pearle explained. "I'm just
saying. You know, so you'll know." Pearle then loudly reiterated
that she is not yelling. "I'm not," she said.
Woman Who Claims Book Changed Her Life Has Not Changed
MEMPHIS, TN— Despite claims that Bruce Wilkinson's The Prayer Of
Jabez: Breaking Through To The Blessed Life, "totally changed [her]
worldview," payroll secretary Brenda Haskell is the same shallow,
distracted person she has always been. "Yeah, ever since reading it,
she's really been elevated to a higher, more profound spiritual
plane," coworker Stephanie Roule said. "I guess that's the spiritual
plane where you spend all day obsessing over your nails."
Valentine's Day Coming A Little Early In Relationship
MONROE, MI— Area resident Todd Munde, who has been dating Lisa
Watros for the past three weeks, lamented Monday that Valentine's
Day is coming a little early in the couple's relationship. "It's
kind of weird to be doing the whole romantic flowers-and-candy
Valentine's Day thing with somebody you just started seeing," said
Munde, 30. "Ideally, we would have started dating last October. That
way, Valentine's Day would have fallen somewhere around the
four-month mark. Oh, well."
now, isn't that fun?
-melanie
Alcohol-Themed Bar Opens
HOUSTON— Fans of alcoholic beverages were excited by the opening of J.T.
O'Drinky's, a new booze-themed bar. "Lots of people love alcohol, so we
figured that a bar centered on that concept was a natural," said Jim
Reichel, owner and creator of the bar. "Patrons can enjoy a 'Gin and Tonic,'
and other whimsically named drinks, as well as enjoy our decor, which
includes posters and neon signs celebrating various beers and liquors."
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