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weld.
bad morning of realization.
bad bad bad.
i see that i am only an exponent of my ideology...
one that lies only in theory,
in ambitious thoughts and conversation.
no manifestation.
not at all manifested.
only synaptic bursts regarding the marriage of
the arts and sciences (engineering, mechanics,
anatomy, and technologies possible only in
the mind as of yet).
bursts strong enough to release and spike
adrenaline flow, but not yet strong enough to
force action over dormancy. gosh, that stings.
duty has ambition over the barrel.
the potential has the kinetic by the throat.
i see that i have done nothing.
even after ten long years planning, nothing.
i see that i am only clerical duty
and typed social interaction.
that stings even worse.
i should have called in sick today.
i should be taking welding classes
and brushing up on anatomical studies.