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Oh, this seems to pertinent to let pass.



Not that we've needed this lately, thank heavens, but I thought we should 
have it on hand in case of emergency.


Begin flame:

Dear: 
[ ] Clueless Newbie [ ] Lamer [ ] AOLer 
[ ] Me too er [ ] Pervert [ ] Loser 
[ ] Spammer [ ] Nerd [ ] Elvis 
[ ] Fed [ ] Freak [ ] Flamebait 
[ ] Other (please specify): _______________
You Are Being Flamed Because: 
[ ] You posted a message concerning a pyramid scheme 
[ ] You posted a "test" in a newsgroup other than alt.test 
[ ] You posted something asking for warez sites 
[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply 
[ ] You continued a long, stupid thread 
[ ] You posted something completely off-topic 
[ ] You started an off-topic thread 
[ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message 
[ ] You said "me too" to something 
[ ] You don't know which group to post in 
[ ] You suck 
[ ] You brag about things that never happened 
[ ] Your sig/alias/server sucks 
[ ] You made up slang then used it in a message 
[ ] You posted a phone-sex ad 
[ ] I don't like your tone of voice 
[ ] I think you might be a fed

To Repent, You Must: 
[ ] Shout "GO RIDE" a thousand times in a packed bus terminal 
[ ] "Upgrade" to Windows 95 
[ ] Give up your AOL account 
[ ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it 
[ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor 
[ ] Actually post something relevant 
[ ] Read the FAQ 
[ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month 
[ ] Post your tests to alt.test 
[ ] Removing yourself from the net (you are hopeless) 
[ ] Removing yourself from existence (you are really hopeless)
In Closing, I'd Like to Say: 
[ ] Bl*w me 
[ ] Get a life 
[ ] Never post again 
[ ] I pity your dog 
[ ] Go to hell 
[ ] Yer momma's so fat/stupid/ugly that etc... 
[ ] Take your shit somewhere else 
[ ] Learn to post or f**k off 
[ ] Do us all a favor and jump into some industrial equipment 
[ ] See how far your tongue will fit into the electric outlet 
[ ] All of the above

End flame.